If at first you don't succed... ah screw it!

Ok well here we are once again folks. Some big news this time. Some if it most of you already know about.

Well first of all, me and Tracy rae now engaged, officially over two weeks. Already planning the wedding. Looks like it will be july the 11th next year, or at least that's what we're aiming for. Ok to anounce things, we have decided on who is in the wedding party. Tracy has her half picked out. For my half it's as follows: Best man: Steve, Groomsmen: Russ, and Kevin. I would've liked to have more but we're trying to keep it small. So I've already asked steve and he said he would be my best man. As for russ and kevin i would like you guys to be my groomsmen. Will get a hold of you two soon to disscuss it. As for flower girl we're thinking Abby right now waiting on the final word from steve on that one, and as for ring bearer right now we're thinking my nephew grayson. That remains to be seen too though. Oh and Chuck, we disscussed it and we would like you to be MC if you're up for it. As for who's doing everything else at this point i'm not sure yet.

Ok now that thats done with, i'd like to make another huge anouncement. Me and Tracy have been viewing apartments, and have decided we're goin to take one right now. So we're moving in together soon. Hopefully shoud have a job soon so things won't be too much of a problem financially that way. And the apartment aloows pets and smoking, so we're all set. Will keep you all posted on things so wish us luck.

Well that's really all i have to say right now. Chat to you all soon.

To sleep perchance to.... bah humbug!!!!

Well here I am again. Been a while... Not like anyone uses or reads these things anymore.

Well it's been about a year and half since I've been posting here. And in retrospect the whole time has been one hell of ride. Complete with its share of ups and downs. But like somone once said "it's not the destination that's important, but the journey to get there" (or something like that, can't really remember how it goes) And it has been quite a journey, one that i have been prowd to take with all of you (everyone important in my life) and one that we will share for a long time, "from here to eternity. " Only part of the way there yet.

Well speeking of journey's i think i've reached a point in mine where i need to really slow down and ocasionaly stop to "smell the roses" enjoy life of course. But sometimes like all things that is easier said than done.

Ok thats enough speeking metaphorically. it's a real turning point in my life right now. And it has been for about a year and a half ago, when i realized that i could overcome things that i believed to be out of my power. but for what ever reason there is always another hurdle in my way. And who knows maybe sometimes i put obstacles in my own way. But i want you all to know that I am much more confident of myself and where i am heading in life. You all have your own problems and need not worry about anything else. I need to start doing the same, but people need not worry about me, i am quite capable of looking after myself. This might be hard to believe. But after everything i have acomplished and overcome in the last 8 years i now realize that i do indeed have the strength to live my life. To live it the way i feel best. Making people understand this though is very dificult at the moment. People are just that 'people' and they do worry. But i am tired of not worying about myself. No offense to anyone. I do really care about those around me, but i am tired of feeling like i'm carying the world on my shoulders." And more recently i am tired of the world shouldering me. Don't get me wrong i still really need the people who are dear and near to me. I know I am not alone in this sentiment, i guess most people go through this at much earlier times in thier lives than i have. This is when i need friends, family, and the one dearest to me the most, but please have faith in me, I have had emense faith in all of you over the years, even when it may not have seemed that way. I just need time to mend, to heal, so please just be yourselves, don't let the problems of others overwhelm you. Time is too precious a thing to waste on doubt and worry. If you don't know what to believe then at least believe in yourself, and those who care about you. This we all need to do. I know i probably sound too preachy right now, but i guess i need to hear myself say this, as much as anyone else needs to hear it. And I do believe in myself, and all of you. So forget about reading this if you have to or pretend i didn't even say if need be. But i guess this blog is probably more important to me than anyone else, as i look back on it, it reminds me.. reminds of where i have come from, and where i hope to one day be.

Well ok i guess i have to stop writing now. And don't worry about me guy's i'm doing just fine. Be talking to you all soon.

Long live the fighters!

Here we are again.

All is going well right now. Tracy just started a new job yesterday, and I applied for a job at the Salvation Army Thrift Store. It's only part time but it will be good experience. I've also got another place or two i will apply at as well. The employment program is coming along well and I am making good progress with it so far.

The summer has been good so far, aside from some crappy weather. Really enjoying things, and having fun being on the go a fair bit.

Things are going awesome with me and Tracy right now. Hard to believe it will be a year together now by the end of August. Looking forward to awesome times together in the coming months. Alot of stuf on the go. Can't say what the next while holds for us in terms of living arangements and stuf, but we'd like to have our own place some time this fall. Will see how that all goes. Would like to have a full time job first. Also there are other posibilities that we'll have to see about, but thats it.

I am getting into a new project soon. A computer rpg game, styled after the old Dungeon Master games, and D&D games like Eye of the Beholder. Would like to make the game system as original as posible. Still thinking up a storry and premise. Just in the early preplanning stage right now. Will keep you all up on this one.

So with this news I let you know now that I have disbanded Electric Gremlin Ideas, and will start a new label for my game programming. Will of course be doing a brand new site and all. Hoping it goes well.

Well not much else to report right now. Will talking with you all again soon. Later.

Stranger than fiction

Howdy people. Here I am again.

Had my next apointment with the employment centre today since i had my "real" intake assesment. Finally learned all about the program today and now have the whole picture on the deal now. And I've got to say it sounds really awesome! I'm extremely impressed. While its called an employment program, what it really is, is a career developement program. The aim is not nesasarily to get me into a job in my field right away but to get me what ever experience i can use to gradualy get me closer to my career goals. Eventually i may even end up with in field related work. The program is layered in a gradual step by step process that will inch me closer to my true goals. Man who knows? in a year i could be selling computers, and in a year after that I could be fixin 'em and stuf. That would be awesome! Well it might not be that quick, but we'll see. I'm hoping to be far enough in the program by the end of the summer to start applying for work which means it will coincide with when all the college students go back to school. I'm excited but trying to stay grounded as well. So we will have to see how it goes.

Me and Tracy are doing awesome right now. Things seem to be moving along well with us right now.

I hope you guys are all doing awesome too. Talk with you all soon.

Let it go Indiana...

Howdy people. Just thought i'd post again today as the last post left out some details that i didn't bring up since i wasn't able to focus on the last post.

Well today Tracy had an interview for a recepsionist job, and it looks verry positive. The details all sound good. As for myself i am hopeful that the employment center will be processing my case soon. There are some extra details about the program that i left out last time. There will be ceminars as well as one on one counselling for resume writing and interview preperation. Also they will speak on my belhalf with employers about making special acomidations where i do have bipolar and anxiety and made need extra considerations, such as optional extra breaktime and specific shift imes, like no over-night shifts. Am really looking forward to getting on the go with the program. Hopefuly i will get something in my field. Who knows... Well here's hoping.

Am starting to make plans for the near future. Me and tracy are thinking about getting a place together probably in the early fall or whenever we can afford to. I'd like to have a job by then and would say that shouldn't be a problem. It will all take a little while to get ironed out anyway.

PS: Just got my apointment for my OT assessment over the phone for next thursday.

Well thats how things have been so i will with you all soon. Will keep you posted here.

Dingo viagra monkey quank

Well it's been a little while, so here's whats been going on.



We had my b-day party on saturday this past weekend. It was a blast. Jon M made his famous chili again. It was awesome. Got some cool gifts from the b'ys. Steve gave me the FF12 strategy guide and a copy of Ghosts N' Ghouls for the NES. Another great gem to add to my collection. Also the guide for ff12 will come in quite handy. What a beuatiful book. Also Chuck gave me a copy of The Darwin Awards, and an IQ puzzle book. The puzzles i will never figure out, but who knows. Thanks guys, real cool gifts! The evening was awesome. Everyone was there at some point in the evening. It was cool chating with everyone again. Me and Tracy had a great time. Thanks Steve for being the host again. I apreciate it greatly. Now that Kevin's home hopefully well all get together again real soon.



Hoping to start writing on the novel again soon, as I have finally decided to actually produce a full featured version of the Beyond Braxis as a video computer game. Will need to the story to write the plot for the game. Also having the storry in novel form as well as a solid working tech demo of the game, will help sell the game to a decent publisher / distributor. The version of the game i will be doing will be a sprite based game. However if i am able to sell the game then i would liketo do it in 3-d.

Today I had an apointment with the employment center again, and oficialy had my intake assessment. I will be hearing back from them soon to set up my OT assessment and should be starting the program soon. Looking forward to getting a decent job soon.

Well time to go. Will keep you guys up on things.

One foot in front of the other

Howdy folks. Things have been going much better lately.

Well I did something today that i have not done in several years. And that is drawing. Gonna do it again tomorow sometime. One of the anime wallpapers i had for doing full sized posters, I drew part of it as practice. The first atempt was crap, so i started over, made it bigger to show more detail. It turned out pretty good actualy. Looking forward to doing more. :) As for the novel and the paper game i will have to get to them again soon too.

Still doing some tweeking on the computer. Downloading music, and ebooks currently. I should an 80 gig sata hard drive by the second week of july. Looking forward to that. Can't wait for that, since i will be able to do some serious downloadding then. I am really impressed with the excelent performance of the revamped machine. I diggin' it.

Still waiting for the student loan thing to get straightened out. Should be hearing from the employment center soon. Also waiting for the school to send me my next shipment. Still got one lesson left on the current shipment. Maintaining an A average.

Well saturday is the party. See you all there at Steve's. Chow.